Hatred and Animosity Rarely Emerge out of Nowhere

“Hatred is not the opposite of love, it is the refusal to confront the painful truths within oneself. The one who hates is often the one who cannot bear the mirror of their own insufficiency, and so they break that mirror in the faces of others. But what is shattered outside still festers within, and so the cycle of hostility renews itself endlessly.” - Carl Jung

“All resentment is born from comparison. A man does not hate another for what he has, but for what that possession reveals about his own lack. The success of another exposes his imagined weakness, his failure to rise, and so envy cloaks itself in the noble language of justice and fairness. But strip away the mask, and you will see only the desperate wish that others be dragged down to his level.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

“He who is filled with animosity is not at war with the world but with himself. Every enemy he invents is a disguise for an internal adversary he cannot overcome. His rage is a projection, his cruelty a diversion, and his violence a desperate attempt to silence the inner judge who never sleeps. In this way, hatred is less a weapon against others than a prison built around the self.” - Sigmund Freud

Anger and hatred are rarely sudden; rather, they are the result of internal conflicts that are reflected in the public environment of interpersonal relationships. An unresolved struggle with oneself lies hidden behind the mask of power worn by the antagonistic personality, which is motivated by jealousy and envy. Fundamentally, their contempt of others stems from their own insufficiency, weakness, or failure. They focus their frustration on imaginary enemies because they find it intolerable to acknowledge this reality. They experience a brief sense of relief from this act of projection. It seems as though they could temporarily put an end to the internal conflict by harming another.

Unhealed trauma is the root cause of a lot of this. People who experienced betrayal, abandonment, or crushing trauma in life grow with a suspicious point of view. They act as though the entire world is a predator just waiting to eat them. A preemptive strike mindset to attack before you can be attacked emerges from this suffering. In their hands, power becomes more about protecting themselves from the demons of the past than it is about growth or empathy. The discharge of resentment permeates every encounter, the wound never heals, and it festers.

The scarcity mindset, or the idea that life is a competition with no winners, is the underlying cause of their envy. They must be being pulled down if someone else climbs. It becomes intolerable to witness someone else's success since it serves as a continual reminder of their own imagined flaws. They may say they want equality, justice, or fairness, but what they really want is for others to fail so that they can feel more secure in their own position. It is the intoxication of elitism and reducing others to size, not the love of justice. This is the reasoning of jealousy presented as morality.

In order to make this point of view easier to live with, antagonists make their targets less human. By taking away people's humanity, they see cruelty as not only okay, but even right. This is the secret math behind hatred: it turns people into symbols so that you can attack that symbol without feeling bad about it.

Still, the picture never stays the same. These states change, and sometimes very quickly. Acts of kindness that come out of the blue can break the cycle of anger and force the antagonist to face the fact that not all enemies are eternal foes. But there is also the opposite risk: people who give compassion without taking care of themselves become hard. Their empathy turns into anger, and they start to dislike each other.

This is where society plays a very important role. One current or the other is boosted by leaders, the media, and the structures of culture. People who live in a society that feeds on fear and division see enemies everywhere. People are less likely to engage in self-destructive envy in a society that promotes empathy and resilience. They also carry power. A smart strategist knows that hostility isn't just a weakness; it's also a tool that can be used, a force that may be redirected or even used, depending on how well the individual plays the game.